My heart is broken ... as are the hearts of so many we love.

Yesterday, the Lord chose to take a wonderful and precious young woman home to his breast ... a young woman we weren't ready to give up just yet. I don't understand why God allows some things ... why in His sovereignty He decided it was the right time to take her home ... away from US. I don't presume to know God's mind in any thing, especially THIS thing.

I do know that God loved our sweet Liis more than we could ever have loved her ... and that was a lot. I am confident that she now sits at the feet of her Lord and Saviour and she's basking in the peace of His presence. Even so, WE are going to miss her amazing spirit ... her kind and loving heart ... and her sweet smile.

Liis was involved in a tragic car accident in Tartu, Estonia, that took her life and the life of 3 others ... still others were severely injured. Liis' sister, Iiris, was travelling with her and her life is now hanging in the balance. We are crying out to God to spare her life and heal her massive injuries. We are crying out to God for mercy to take away the possibility that she may never walk again. We are crying out to God to show His power in her miraculous healing. We are crying out to God for the gift of putting our arms around her soon.

Please join us in prayer for the family of Liis and Iiris ... for their family and their friends who are spread far and wide. For those in Estonia ... and those in the States. These girls will forever have affected my life and touched my heart. These girls will forever have affected the lives of so many. What blessings we've received by being apart of their lives.

Today marked the 3-year anniversary of our son's death. It's been a more difficult day than I would have guessed. You'd think that after so long, your heart wouldn't feel the wrenching pain the way it did in the beginning ... but that's just not the way it is. In some ways it seems as if this year's anniversary was the most painful yet. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because with each passing year those who join you on your journey become less and less. The road is just more lonely. This makes those who walked with me today even more precious and I wanted to say 'thank you' to all who did. Thanks to all of you who cried with me, who wrote sweet email messages, who left phone messages ... and who sent flowers. My heart is touched in an incredible way.

I wish I could share with you all the memories that have been flooding my mind today ... especially all the happy ones. Dustin was my son. He was also a brother, an uncle, a friend, a protector, a soldier ... and without a doubt, a clown.

One of my daughters reminded me of the last time we were all together as a family ... November 2004. We called it Thanksmas since we were celebrating Thanksgiving and Christmas together... right before we left for the mission field of Estonia. We all had brought stocking stuffers for each other. All the 'boys' received various cartoon boxer shorts which they quickly pulled on over their britches and modeled for us. Dustin, of course, was the entertainer of the group .. prancing around enough to worry his mom over the fact that he did it so well. Even though they aren't the greatest, I'm so glad we took pictures of their silliness that day ... they are among my most treasured memories. Just looking at them makes me smile. He's the second from the right in this shot ... with all of his equally silly family of boys.

We have been blessed with a wonderful family (those who claim us ). Though our road is otherwise sometimes lonely ... these precious people are always there beside us. Thanks for being our friends ... and our family.

The following poen was written by Dustin's special friend, who also happens to be my son-in-law ...

Dustin Lee Kendall

Prouder nay has been a man,

When life was laid for him, a friend,

To tell the tale and cry the tear,

And wish him back to hold him near.

To think that I could be so blessed,

To have a friend who thought life less,

Than freedom for his fellow kin,

And thought it worthy to defend.

We will remember Dustin Lee,

A day won't pass that we won't see,

His face before us in our minds,

Though tears from eyes may fall sometimes.

Tears are real and pain is strong,

But we know that it won't be long,

'til all together we'll meet up there,

And once again that SMILE he'll share.

I know another who such did,

For me and mine our sin to rid,

Did choose His life to give away,

So I could live another day.

And gratitude is what we give

We show it in the life we live,

Freed for freedom is what we've been,

Freed from oppression, and freed from sin.

So don't forget the sacrifice,

Of two who came and gave their lives,

Some difference between may be,

But both showed love for even me.

By Justin B. Carroll

 

For many across our nation, Memorial Day is a holiday ... an extra day to kick back, party, swim and eat to their hearts content. To thousands of others, it's a reminder of loved ones who have willingly sacrificed their lives for our freedom and comforts.

Though more than two years have passed since we said good-bye to the one we love, we continue to miss him ... and we continue to honor him for what he did.

Yesterday was a special day of honoring for Dustin ... a time of dedication. A new education building in Iraq was built so our soldiers can continue working on their educations when they aren't busy defending us. This building was named after him and dedicated to him in his memory (we should be receiving pictures from his commander soon). He was working so hard on his education in the midst of his soldiering, we know he would be so proud to be a part of seeing that come about for the soldiers that he knew and loved.

Thank you to our special friends who were especially attentive to realize that yesterday was a hard day for our family. Thank you to those who wrote notes and called to say you were thinking of us ...  thank you to those who didn't forget. We love you and hold you dear to our hearts.

In Loving Memory of our Soldier Son

Cpl. Dustin Lee Kendall

KIA 1-15-06

Operation Iraqi Freedom

I came across this ... A Military Wife's Memorial Day Diary. I don't know her but I appreciated her words ... thought you might like to read it as well.

Last week was Kayli's big recital ... the end of her theatre arts class that she's been taking. She's been having a wonderful time learning how to refine all the talents she already possessed. She's been pretty good at being a drama queen for most of her life but at her recital she had the opportunity to be just a little bit less. A little bit less in stature that is. She performed a monologue from 'Alice in Wonderland', in a pretty good English accent, I might add. Even though she did have a kitty-cat to scold and instruct, it quietly accepted Alice's guidance without talking back. What a good little kitty it was.  =0).

Kayli was all decked out in Alice's blue dress and apron, her black MaryJane shoes and her white knee-high socks. She was soo cute and she did a wonderful job of her performance.

Her daddy lavished roses on her in congratulations when she was finished and we all got to celebrate with her over a scrumptuous meal of steak and hot sourdough bread.  yum!

The theater was very dark so the photos aren't too wonderful ... still ... I thought you'd enjoy a peek into the evening.

While we were gone this weekend, Amber and her crew came in to help hold down the fort. We missed them by about an hour so we had to go to the retreat without seeing them. They apparently had a wonderful time here with Jared and Kayli and they didn't miss us a bit.

We were blessed though, that they got to stay through Monday so we got some special time with them. Austyn turned 4-years-old on Tuesday so we celebrated her birthday with all kinds of princess things while she was here. We also got to grab some time in front of the camera to capture her special day, in her new frilly princess outfit. Ethan and Addy allowed me some time to click off a few of them as well.

If you visit my photography blog, you've already seen these, but thought I'd share them here as well.

Well, as I look at the date of my last entry, I realize how busy we've really been. I know some of you think you've been forgotten but that's not true. The fact is, we're pretty exhausted. It seems that the last couple of years (and old age) have begun to seriously catch up on us ... and we're thinking we might be in need of a major overhaul. =0)

This being the case, it seemed like a good time to take a short break. So ... this past weekend, Brandi and I stole away for a 'sabbatical' retreat for couples in the ministry. We shared the weekend with folks we'd never met before ... four amazing 'staff' couples and seven other couples who work in the ministry in some way. We spent some amazing time sharing our hearts with one another, and studying and worshipping together. It's hard to believe that only four days could bring about such bonding but we were blessed to walk away feeling as if though we'd been friends for years .. and knowing that we've got a new support system that is sorely needed.  

Sharing your heart always builds a bond. Of course, being closed up with 50 people in a room the size of a bathroom ... and spending time praying for protection ... will also make people close. Our group was at a retreat / conference center along with other groups who were there for various reasons. Saturday night, during our supper break, we were whisked away to the nearest 'shelter' because of a tornado coming our way. The dangerous color of the sky and the funnels coming down from the sky were all too familiar. We had just done this only a few nights before, in Granbury, where 12 tornadoes had touched down around us. Anyway ... we scrunched up tight into a little room of the conference center with about half of our group and many from another. The other group included quite a few little munchkins who didn't even seem bothered by the fierce, howling wind and the frightening pounding of the golf-ball sized hail that lasted more than thirty minutes. Thankfully, the damage was done on the outside of our place of shelter, rather than to the precious bodies contained within. The cars in the parking lot were not so lucky! We now have a beautifully dimpled SUV and a thankful heart that God's protective hand was on us.

Even with our moments of adventure, we were able to experience a treasured time of peacefulness. The grounds were beautiful ... perfect for long walks and some photo opportunities.

The art below is created from a photo I took inside a gorgeous little chapel there. It reminded me of the lovely little churches we used to visit in Estonia and Europe.

And this one from a view along the road as we walked.

We had a long weekend at LTC but it was a wonderful time of fellowship ... and reunion. We got to see Sheri, Butch/Suzanne, Stephanie and the Bank's girls ... all but Kaci (sad face). We enjoyed catching up over coffee and visiting while bopping back and forth between events that our kiddos were involved in. It's always wonderful to get together with the Bank's ... but it's always hard to say good-bye, as well.

Our congregation brought home lots of wonderful awards in various areas. They were amazing! Our Estonian congregation also had entries again this year. Always amazing is their beautiful scrapbook with handmade cover and loads of photos of people we love and miss. Of course, I cried when I saw all the photos and special pages ... still, just touching it made me feel closer to all of them. As always, they did a beautiful job. I didn't get to judge their work but they get a 'gold' in my book. =0)

Kayli's hard work paid off with several gold medals. Here are the results of her entries / events:

Bible Reading ~ Silver / Children's Book ~ Gold / Large Chorus ~ Silver / Photography ~ Gold / Puppets ~ Gold / Signing for the Deaf ~ Gold / Service Challenge ~ Gold / Teaching Challenge ~ Gold

She was a little disappointed in the Bible Reading results ... turns out that things are done differently here than we did them in Estonia. There we had all the kids wear their LTC tshirts for all events ... here they are required to dress-up for some. She wasn't prepared to do that, so she lost her gold medal in Bible Reading because she wasn't dressed for the occasion. No big deal ... she will know for next year.

She got lots of nice compliments though on her other judging sheets. One judge told her she should consider being a deaf interpreter (it helps to have an interpreter brother for her teacher ~ smile) and another told her they could picture her photograph for sale in a Christian bookstore. Needless to say, she's a bit pumped. We're awfully proud as well.

Here is her winning photograph -- I think she's turning into a pretty good little photographer, if I might say so myself.

Off to LTC (Leadership Training for Christ) Convention ... wish us safe travel and pray that our kids will be able to share their amazing talent and hard work. Our congregation is participating in Chorus, Drama, Puppets, Sign Language Interpretation, Bible Reading, Speech, Art (Photography, Drawing, Painting), Service and Teaching Challenges, etc.

We're also rooting for our Estonian church who has sent some beautiful work to be judged as well. They've already had their Estonian convention ... see the Tartu church site for pictures and details.

We'll let you know how things go.

My life on a normal day, is a little crazy ... it seems I'm always on the run. I've always got a list of things to do that need completing. Always trying to take care of people ... always trying to meet my responsibilities. I find myself, at the end of the day, wondering if any memories were made for the most important people in my life ... and so often knowing that none were.

Today my oldest daughter shared this with me. It's written by a teenager with terminal cancer. Once again, I'm reminded how important it is to grasp each moment and treasure it in my heart for always.

SLOW DANCE

I'm back in South Carolina. Have been attending a photographer's business conference. Will get a day with grandbabies tomorrow and then back home on Friday.

I did want to share an important prayer request with you all. Our neighbors, the Dix family, suffered a great loss three days ago. On their way to church on Sunday night, their three teenage girls were involved in a tragic automobile accident. Two of their daughters were injured and airflighted to Ft. Worth for emergency care .. and their 16 year-old daughter, Alyssa, lost her life. As you can imagine, their family is deeply grieved.

Please keep the Dix family in your prayers ... and ask our Father to bestow extra measures of grace on us, so that we may offer some comfort in the midst of their pain.