My heart is broken ... as are the hearts of so many we love.

Yesterday, the Lord chose to take a wonderful and precious young woman home to his breast ... a young woman we weren't ready to give up just yet. I don't understand why God allows some things ... why in His sovereignty He decided it was the right time to take her home ... away from US. I don't presume to know God's mind in any thing, especially THIS thing.

I do know that God loved our sweet Liis more than we could ever have loved her ... and that was a lot. I am confident that she now sits at the feet of her Lord and Saviour and she's basking in the peace of His presence. Even so, WE are going to miss her amazing spirit ... her kind and loving heart ... and her sweet smile.

Liis was involved in a tragic car accident in Tartu, Estonia, that took her life and the life of 3 others ... still others were severely injured. Liis' sister, Iiris, was travelling with her and her life is now hanging in the balance. We are crying out to God to spare her life and heal her massive injuries. We are crying out to God for mercy to take away the possibility that she may never walk again. We are crying out to God to show His power in her miraculous healing. We are crying out to God for the gift of putting our arms around her soon.

Please join us in prayer for the family of Liis and Iiris ... for their family and their friends who are spread far and wide. For those in Estonia ... and those in the States. These girls will forever have affected my life and touched my heart. These girls will forever have affected the lives of so many. What blessings we've received by being apart of their lives.

Today marked the 3-year anniversary of our son's death. It's been a more difficult day than I would have guessed. You'd think that after so long, your heart wouldn't feel the wrenching pain the way it did in the beginning ... but that's just not the way it is. In some ways it seems as if this year's anniversary was the most painful yet. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because with each passing year those who join you on your journey become less and less. The road is just more lonely. This makes those who walked with me today even more precious and I wanted to say 'thank you' to all who did. Thanks to all of you who cried with me, who wrote sweet email messages, who left phone messages ... and who sent flowers. My heart is touched in an incredible way.

I wish I could share with you all the memories that have been flooding my mind today ... especially all the happy ones. Dustin was my son. He was also a brother, an uncle, a friend, a protector, a soldier ... and without a doubt, a clown.

One of my daughters reminded me of the last time we were all together as a family ... November 2004. We called it Thanksmas since we were celebrating Thanksgiving and Christmas together... right before we left for the mission field of Estonia. We all had brought stocking stuffers for each other. All the 'boys' received various cartoon boxer shorts which they quickly pulled on over their britches and modeled for us. Dustin, of course, was the entertainer of the group .. prancing around enough to worry his mom over the fact that he did it so well. Even though they aren't the greatest, I'm so glad we took pictures of their silliness that day ... they are among my most treasured memories. Just looking at them makes me smile. He's the second from the right in this shot ... with all of his equally silly family of boys.

We have been blessed with a wonderful family (those who claim us ). Though our road is otherwise sometimes lonely ... these precious people are always there beside us. Thanks for being our friends ... and our family.

The following poen was written by Dustin's special friend, who also happens to be my son-in-law ...

Dustin Lee Kendall

Prouder nay has been a man,

When life was laid for him, a friend,

To tell the tale and cry the tear,

And wish him back to hold him near.

To think that I could be so blessed,

To have a friend who thought life less,

Than freedom for his fellow kin,

And thought it worthy to defend.

We will remember Dustin Lee,

A day won't pass that we won't see,

His face before us in our minds,

Though tears from eyes may fall sometimes.

Tears are real and pain is strong,

But we know that it won't be long,

'til all together we'll meet up there,

And once again that SMILE he'll share.

I know another who such did,

For me and mine our sin to rid,

Did choose His life to give away,

So I could live another day.

And gratitude is what we give

We show it in the life we live,

Freed for freedom is what we've been,

Freed from oppression, and freed from sin.

So don't forget the sacrifice,

Of two who came and gave their lives,

Some difference between may be,

But both showed love for even me.

By Justin B. Carroll